Things 2-year-olds understand:

1. Making noise
2. How to make the TV remote really sticky
3. MINE!!!
4. The fine art of scattering toys
5. How to eat with a fork without actually getting any food in your mouth.

Things 2-year-olds do not understand:

1. “I’ll be right back.”

And man, wouldn’t life be so much easier if they did?